blahh moment

Once a month, for real, I always had this mood swings...If you're close to me then you'll get what I mean...it's not that something I am proud of or nothing that i actually detest in that...somehow during this period I came to a sense that I am discovering myself more, but in an uncontrollable ways...not by throwing tantrums I mean, but something very close from that...

Lets just get to the real point of this updates then...from the deepest darkest from any arteries it might be in my heart (I let go of the real anatomy studies long ago as you might see) I really do want to apologise for my every deeds and beings during these period of swings and for any tantrums I ever threw to anyone...especially to those I care the most...Its hard I know, but please deal and stay with me.Thank you.

i'm fine

we've been fighting this few days.hate it.but we think we're too good to alter our own ego.

Monday is too soon

Spending everyday of my weekends on the bed because of the heavy rain. The next 2-3 weeks will be sure tough with lots of test and quizzes. Aiming high to score wouldn't help much with this level of laziness..nothing's as simple as we'd wish.WORK HARD!

To forgive and to forget

Asking for forgiveness is the act of repentant. Forgiving is the act of mercy. Most of us often said they’ll easily forgive but not forget. Is that considered as the act of mercy and what you should get back in return for the matter of your repentance?

Sometimes I believe it’s what reality is to forge but never forget, and sometime brings back the hate, detest, and the guilt back. It’s just who we are.

Spending time thinking about the act of forgiveness seems to give me a new idea of what being forgiving and forgiveness is. Whereby it does not come when someone is asking for your forgiveness but from the moment they made mistake.

True forgiveness comes from God. The God the Almighty. Creator of heaven and earth. Who’s forgiving all your sins and hears all your prayer. Making mistakes means we’re battling against ourselves. Doing things that we’re not supposed to do, and by repenting we overcome this.

Back to the real matter, what if God forgives us, but never forget what we’ve done? Will we get true forgiveness from God? If so, should we continue to forgive others without forgetting what they’ve done to us?? Fair enough isn’t it?

Insecurities

I am pretty confidence with the way I hold myself up. In certain situation I did well! Despite all those, I am very insecure until to certain point its unbearable ( I need help!) LOL. Here’s my head to toe lists;
1. My hair never will be any longer even when I’m using the most expensive hair care in salon.
2. My skin’s getting darker by days. (It’s not tanned okay, its dark. black dark!)
3. Nose and etcetera...no comment. It’s a give, and I have nothing against the Higher power.
4. Okay now comes the worst part of this, my neck to the body part. urghhh..fat fat fat. Yes it’s my fault i didn’t do my work out. But I’m too good in making excuses for myself.
5. I have boobies...(means small boobs!) body fat, everywhere around my belly. Hahahaha
6. Owwhh hard to mention my flabby arms.
7. Then there goes my flabby thigh. Or should I describe it as unattractive??
8. Short legs..very unsuitable for my body...
Ahhh..it’s always felt so good after mourning about ourselves...but somehow I feel very bad doing so. For me complaining mean ungrateful. ceywahh

certain things

Certain thing that I miss

Certain thing that I can’t live without

Certain thing that I’m holding too

Certain thing that keeps me down

Certain thing that I stay put

Certain thing that makes me shines

All does certain uncertainties...

We failed to describe,

Sometime don’t even bother to,

Are the most CERTAIN thing.